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Journal Entry Before Bed

Wow. It’s already August. I feel like this summer just started and then I’ve just been in this surreal dream for the past five weeks. Where did the time go? Never in six weeks have I felt like I’ve changed so much as a person. The friends I’ve made here I know I’ll be in touch with for years to come and all of my instructors have had lasting impressions on me. Strange to think that I could have easily done anything else with my summer instead of this. Anything else now seems inferior and as though I’d be missing out on this once in a lifetime experience. I often think of what led me to where I am right now. What chain of random occurrences led me to China…led me to this exact program with these exact people.

Before I came here, I remember having doubts about leaving my home for six weeks to a place I’d never been before with ten other people I didn’t know. Staying in the U.S. and possibly doing an acting intensive sounded a lot safer and maybe even more fun. Boy was I wrong. I thought being in China wouldn’t help me with my acting skills, but I was wrong. I realized in China that everything you do in life helps you with everything else you do… Every experience you have, will in some capacity, help you to better understand yourself. On this trip I’ve felt more present than I have in two years. I’ve felt more reflective, independent, and confident.

As I start to think about leaving and flying back to the U.S. next week, I’m overwhelmed with  emotions; but to put it simply: excited and sad… but not just sad. Sad in a way that I know my life is about to dramatically change and I’ll never be able to go back to this exact place with all these exact people on this exact trip. Overall this has been the most unique and unforgettable experience of my life and I’d never go back and change anything.